he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
