can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize