Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
