Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Life is so much better after having sex.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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