I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize