The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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