thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize