He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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