im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
