How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
