This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
