the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
We have so much sex to catch up on
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
