So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
