Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
