the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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