I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Someone shattered a urinal.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
