Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Randomize
