I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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