From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize