I just made out with a guy for $7.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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