I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
