NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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