We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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