ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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