It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
i out mim tonsoeep
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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