yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
