She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
