I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize