DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
