Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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