I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
