Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
