Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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