i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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