So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize