Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
