this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize