So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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