They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Also, beer. Big fan.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
