A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
