do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I need a beard to bite.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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