were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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