Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
