its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
