"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Randomize