His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
