Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
