We're facebook friends in real life
Pants 0. Shit 1.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I believe in your delicious
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
