it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
YAS. BRING CRAB.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
