ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Randomize
