We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
