...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
